Can I Fall in Love With Someone I'm Not Attracted To?

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I can't imagine it would be pleasurable for either of us in that case. Is it like a supposed crush, where every time you see them, your face lights up as though you opened the best present ever?

And I do think once you're past the age where sex is a novelty, it's just impossible to be with someone to whom you're not genuinely attracted. Eager to learn more, I asked two experts what they think. Being in a relationship solely for the sex isn't necessarily a bad thing, if that's what you want.

When You Should Keep Dating Someone You’re Not Attracted To

Whether the initial electricity wore off or you never really felt that special spark, wondering if you can love someone who you aren't physically attracted to isn't entirely uncommon. Before you rush to ditch your relationship or disregard a possible love connection, consider the entire range of feelings that you have towards the other person and what you are truly looking for in a romantic partner. Attraction and love aren't always the same thing. Sometimes the two aren't even in the same ballpark. Although plenty of loving relationships spring from an intense initial attraction, the physical connection that you feel towards someone else doesn't always signal something deeper. An overwhelming attraction without anything else -- such as closeness -- is more like lust than love. That said, an outrageously intense attraction often quickly fizzles, leaving behind no real relationship in its wake. If this is what you're experiencing, don't expect to suddenly fall in love with the object of your infatuation. While intense attraction on its own isn't enough to sustain a real relationship, what happens if it's never there in the first place? Unlike an attraction that fades, never having it isn't likely to land you in love. When you have no attraction to begin with, it's unlikely that you'll continue on in the relationship long enough to develop a close emotional bond. Without this bond, you can't have a true love commitment. Before you completely throw out the idea of loving someone who you think that you're not attracted to, take another look at what attraction is. While physical attraction is often foremost on the minds of young daters, you'll also find that other parts of the people you date can pull you in. As you mature, you'll begin to develop attractions based on inner qualities such as intelligence or a sense of humor. Doing so makes it possible to fall in love with someone who isn't necessarily a beauty queen or a handsome hunk, but is kind, quirky, funny and super-smart. Just because you don't feel attraction off the bat doesn't mean that there's a 100 percent failure rate when it comes to falling in love. While you might not want to stick around long enough to develop closeness with someone who isn't attractive to you, if that person has something that grabs your attention, you may want to get to know him better. This doesn't mean that you should start dating the person immediately; instead, kick things off as friends. As your friendship grows, you can see if an attraction eventually builds, turning platonic love into the romantic kind. About the Author Based in Pittsburgh, Erica Loop has been writing education, child development and parenting articles since 2009. She has a Master of Science in applied developmental psychology from the University of Pittsburgh's School of Education.

Here are nine things to look out for when trying to decide if you're just totally hot for a person, or you're really in love. This is 100% the case, there are guys like this. Makes perfect sense to me. I've done a lot of servile research on fetishes and kink. Lust and love can be extremely confusing, especially when sex is involved. Be a better you, for You and no one else and the upside to that is you will make yourself even more attractive. Better that than him pan himself through all kinds of hoops only to find it makes no difference in the way she feels about him regardless. Their body excites you, their looks attract you. It's the psychic magic of the unconscious. Thank you for sharing your experience. Everyones different, and servile people put more stick into one thing over another.